an honour

At 19, I read a sentence that re-terraformed my head: 

“The level of matter in the universe has been constant since the Big Bang.”

In all the aeons we have lost nothing, we have gained nothing - not a speck, not a grain,

 not a breath. The universe is simply a sealed, twisting kaleidoscope that has reordered itself a trillion trillion trillion times over.

Each baby, then, is a unique collision - a cocktail, a remix - of all that has come before: made from molecules of Napoleon and stardust and comets and whale tooth; 

colloidal mercury and Cleopatra’s breath: 

and with the same darkness that is between the stars between, and inside, our own atoms.

When you know this, you suddenly see the crowded top deck of the bus, in the rain, as a miracle: this collection of people is by way of a starburst constellation. 

Families are bright, irregular-shaped nebulae. 

Finding a person you love is like galaxies colliding. 

We are all peculiar, unrepeatable, perambulating micro-universes - 

we have never been before and we will never be again. 

Oh God, the sheer exuberant, unlikely face of our existences. 

The honour of being alive. 

They will never be able to make you again. 

Don’t you dare waste a second of it thinking something better will happen when it ends. Don’t you dare.

Caitlin Moran

At times we need to put on our armour, speak up, fight. 

The problem is when the armour becomes part of our muscle and bone, 

harshness and suspicion an abiding attribute of the soul.

Piero Ferruci, Beauty & the Soul

walk your way through

Above all do not lose your desire to walk. 

Everyday I walk myself into a state of wellbeing and walk away from every illness. 

I have walked myself into my best thoughts and I know of no thought so burdensome 

that one cannot walk away from it. 

Thus if one keeps on walking everything will be all right.

Søren Kierkegaard

Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. 

It’s about the choice to show up and be real. 

The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.

Brené Brown 

Have enough courage to trust love one more time and always one more time

Maya Angelou

let go

Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection.

Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection: 

Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be 

and Embrace Who You Are

It is all up to us. We are the ones who have to keep looking at our thoughts, 

looking for the nature of our mind. 

There is nobody else in control of our lives, 

our experiences,

our freedom or our bondage.

 Dzogchen Ponlop Rinpoche 

Anytime you’re gonna grow, you’re gonna lose something. 

You’re losing what you’re hanging onto to keep safe.

You’re losing habits that you’re comfortable with,

 you’re losing familiarity.

James Hillman  

There are always more opportunities to get it right, 

to fashion our lives in the ways we deserve to have them. 

Don’t waste your time hating a failure. 

Failure is a greater teacher than success.

Clarissa Pinkola Estés

'Chances are we are the same;

Against the odds, against the grain

We lean, like gardens toward light,

But we wait, like evening for night,

Don’t we?

Chances are we are alike;

Against what better judgement writes

We ache like children for love,

For a purpose worthy of

Such a noble aim,

Such a noble aim,

Such a noble aim as love.

Chances are we bruise the same;

A family tree desperate for rain.

A thirst only deserts know best.

A hurt so at home in our chests.

Call it stubbornness or bravery,

To let our branches continue to reach,

With such a noble aim,

With such a noble aim,

With such a noble aim as love.

Every broken branch and loosened leaf

That we’ve grown to ignore,

Is now a part of something greater than before.

Every nest that rests upon our limbs,

Seeking shelter from the storms,

Is a purpose worth being broken for.

Chances are we are the same;

Against the odds, against the grain

We lean, like gardens toward light.

We reach with all of our might

For such a noble aim as love.'

Rilke said a great thing about how when you are young, 

you perceive a relationship as a fusion.

 When people come together too young, they try to become one person.

 As you get older, you realize that you don’t want to become one person

because then you lose the person you are. 

Rilke’s whole idea was that a good relationship is two people who stand guard 

at the gates of each other’s solitude or singularity.

learning

I am learning every day to allow the space between where I am and where I want to be 

to inspire me and not terrify me.

Tracee Ellis Ross

They say a leopard can’t change its spots. 

But we’re not leopards. We’re humans. Our defining characteristic is our adaptability… 

We adapt to survive. 

My point is: we can—to some extent—“change our spots.” 

For the better. Don’t judge people. 

Allow them to grow.

Tom Hiddleston